Good changes, bad reasons

I mentioned in passing in my introduction, I'm an ADHD'er. I was diagnosed in my mid 30's and I've been engaging in therapy, meditation, medication, excercise, and connecting with the community at large since then to find more/new ways to manage my symptoms, understand myself, and to just feel less isolated.

For anyone not familiar, one of the most generally effective medication families for ADHD are stimulants. Usually, strongly regulated ones (at least here in the US). That makes the overall process of getting them extremely challenging for someone with a below average amount of executive function. You can only ever get a 30 day supply. You can only get a new one filled 1-3 days before you run out. You have to call your physician's office (or, if you're lucky enough to have an online portal, engage that way) to specifically request another fill. And all along the way, you have to prove that you're not seeking these for abusive/recreational use. Over and over again.

If all that weren't bad enough, there's a recent (and possibly worsening?) shortage of these medications, often causing people to need alternatives to their already working medications when they aren't avaliable. And, because the US Helth Insurance system is a prime example of the Capitalist Hellscape we call home, insurance providers are also reducing / removing coverage.

Which is where our tale really comes together. A little over a week ago, I got a letter from my health insurance provider that they were reducing coverage on my currently perscribed medication to "keep my premuiums down" (bullshit, its to keep profits up). They helpfully provided a list of "acceptable alternatives" I could select to reduce my monthly costs. Now, my monthly costs weren't astronomical, but they were already higher than I thought they ought to be for a medication required to function "normally" (there's a lot to unpack there, and I'm not going to do that right now) in a society that is (I believe unintentionally) actively hostile to people with divergent processing patterns. So, I decided that rather than have them increase by an unknown (at least to me) amount, I'd forward that list of medications to my Primary Care Provider and discuss the options with him.

A few days later, right as I was about to hit my "I need another monthly fill" date, I heard back, and my PCP sent in a script for one of the suggested alternatives. Shockingly, this medication actually feels like it works better than the one I had been on, costs less, and insurance isn't going to fuck me over on it in the next few months.

So, as the title of the post says, its shaping up to be a good change, for shit reasons. And while I am pleased with the change, I am still livd that it was driven by profits.

I don't really have any good conclusions here, so I guess I'll just say

See you out there.